I want to preface this by saying that nothing works for everyone. There's a reason why people still struggle with weight and fitness everyday and it's because there is no cookie cutter solution. What worked for me might prove didley for someone else; I think this is what makes losing weight so frustrating for a lot of people. But, I think my approach was pretty good and I hope that it can help other people too. Plus, I wasn't successful right from the beginning. I had to kiss a few frogs, so to speak, before I found something that worked for me. At the end of the day, listen to your body and try lots of approaches (just don't listen to your body if it tells you to eat McDonald's all the time. I think that's what got me in this mess in the first place). So, without further ado...my story...
About a year ago, during the 2010 Winter Olympics, in fact, I had an 'Aha Moment' about my weight. I think we all have these. At some point we are brutally confronted with pants that won't close, muffin top that looks more and more hideous day after day and a trip up the stairs that leaves us surprisingly breathless. I had this moment at my parents' house while staying there to be with my little sister. I remember, vividly, the feeling of disgust and loathing that came when my pants would not fit. I could not get them to close, at all. I won't lie to you, this moment had been months in the making. Months of sucking in more and more to make them fit; it wasn't as if, overnight, I gained all this weight. But at that moment I came brutally face-to-face with my increasing girth. And it wasn't a good feeling. The very next day I went for a run. I told myself this wasn't going to be me - I wasn't going to be one of those people who gains 5-10 pounds a year and is unrecognizable by the time they reach 30. No sir, not me. So I started, slowly, running around the block. I think I made it for 10 minutes before I decided I'd had enough. I realized that maybe running wasn't for me - but I knew I had to make fitness part of my life.
I started buying workout DVD's off of Amazon and working at at home for the next 3 months. I don't know if this worked, or if it didn't. I can tell you I didn't notice much of a difference in my clothing, but I felt better. At least I was doing something. In May, my boss and I decided to try a bootcamp together. I was living unhappily in a body I didn't recognize, and she was getting married in the Summer and eager to get fit too. So, we signed up for Survivor Bootcamp and
The first few sessions (or weeks...) we're hard. I was unfit and unhappy with all the things my body couldn't do. We had an amazing trainer/instructor who was truly more like a friend. She pushed us to be our best and push ourselves without making me feel like a weak, unfit loser who couldn't keep up. By the middle of the summer I was starting to feel stronger and fitter (and it was showing - I could now do twice as many pushups and run a kilometer in significantly less time). I was also starting to see changes. I had to buy new pants and shirts - my waistline was shrinking and it was incredibly gratifying. The first time I really noticed it (it's weird how you'll wake up one day and notice a difference, when in reality it was a gradual process) I almost started to cry. All that hardwork, all that pain, all the emotions I experienced to get to that point were finally starting to pay off. I felt 100% more confident about my body. I no longer agonized over having to wear shorts or a bathing suit (I still wasn't totally comfortable, but I no longer dreaded it). I felt good about my thighs again, and I felt good about my arms that we're starting to look less like flabby chicken wings. And this was only a couple of months in! I bought new clothes, new dresses and felt great about myself! I started to get compliments from family and friends and I felt fantastic - and even more motivated to keep going!
I finally weighed myself, for the first time in nearly two years, in July. I don't feel like we should be ashamed about weight so I will say my number. I weighed 150.1 pounds. About what I thought, but certainly not a number I loved to see. I made the mistake of not weighing myself at the beginning of my journey, but I estimate I had lost at least 5-10 pounds by the time I weighed in at 150. That wasn't a thought I liked to dwell on. But, I kept moving forward, eager to work harder and drop even more weight! I started keeping a food diary on my Blackberry during the summer as well. The sad truth is, weight loss is 90% nutrition. You can destroy a good day's workout in 5 minutes of eating. Keeping track of every little thing that I ate gave me back control over my diet and opened my eyes to the food traps I was falling into time and again. It allows me to have my snacks and my treats - but it makes sure that I fit them into my daily eating plan and caloric allowance. I can't recommend this enough if you're trying to lose weight! It sounds harsh and crazy, but it works. You'll be amazed at what you thought you were eating before and how bad for you a lot of that stuff actually is!!
I did bootcamp until early November when the weather got too cold to continue - and I continued to see signs of weight loss in the way my clothes were fitting. I signed up for a gym membership absolutely terrified that I would lose momentum and let myself slide back into a life I wasn't ready to return to. I loved my new body and my new self-confidence. I loathed having to buy 'fat pants' again. I made a promise to myself to go the gym at least 3 times a week and keep up my bootcamp schedule. I weighed myself again in November and to my delight I had lost another 10 lbs! WOW...nothing feels as good as seeing a visual confirmation of what your body has been feeling. Fantastic! I made a vow to myself to not become obsessed with the number on a scale. What mattered was how I felt and how my clothes were fitting. A number is so subjective to what time of the month it is, what time you weigh yourself and if you've put on muscle weight. But still, it is a fairly important indicator of your progress. So, once a month weigh ins began as I started a new chapter of my journey - gym workouts.
I'd never liked gym workouts in the past. I never knew what to do, where to go, how to do it, and I always felt lost in a sea of super fit people. Bootcamp gave me the tools and confidence to know what I was doing (or at least fake it really well) and not feel so unfit and self-conscious at the gym. I started going to different group fitness classes and running on the treadmill combined with different strength moves I learned in bootcamp. A month later in December I had lost another 4 pounds! I kept going to the gym and keeping that promise I made to myself to go 3 times a week (at least) and, despite ample Christmas goodies consumed, by January I had lost another 4 pounds! I'm about a week away from my next weigh in and I'm hoping I can drop below 130 for the first time since I was about 16! I weigh 132 lbs right now and am so happy! I know I have a little more I want to lose, some areas I want to tighten and tone up and I know I could be fitter, so I'm not done yet! But I also know that I have made fitness a part of my life for good, as much as I hate it and as much as I'd almost always rather be reading a good book or watching some good TV. I've made a decision to not just let life pass me by while I'm unhealthily sitting on the couch wishing I could look like those skinny bitches on TV. I know I won't ever be one of those skinny bitches - that isn't what I want. I want to be the best me I can, and I know that involves taking care of my body, being proud of my curves and being confident about the way I look. I'm 90% there and it feels fantastic. I know I have more to lose, the jiggly bits remind me of that! But it's so important to be in the moment and be thankful for what you have, so I am making conscious decisions everyday to be thankful I've been able to work hard and come this far. I resolve every morning to make the best of my day and to make good decisions and to make my next meal a healthy one, while also trying to allow myself the freedom to 'cheat' and enjoy the good stuff life has to offer: like eating out with friends, a good glass of wine or some delicious chocolate.
So, that's my journey and how I did it. It was mostly a lot of hard work, some tears, some perseverance and a lot more hardwork. Was it easy? No. I worked hard at bootcamp 3 times a week and I changed my diet and stopped eating all of my favorite foods all the time. Was it fast? No. As you've read, this process has been ongoing for the better part of a year, and I've been working out in earnest for over 6 months. It doesn't happen overnight. Was it really 'hard' in the way an impossible exam is hard? No. In that sense it was easy. It's a pretty simple formula: get moving + calorie watching=weight loss. It's like having an equation you know the answer to - but you have to show your work. Fitness and working out are the work part of it. We all just want to write down the answer, get the question right and ace the exam. But we have to show our work. It's input vs. output. That's not to diminish my accomplishment - I worked damn hard at the gym and during bootcamp and I became much stronger at resisting temptation - but it's the truth. There's no fancy weight loss gimmick that will work. You just need to expend more calories than you take in. It's simple, really. The hard part of it involves saying no to your favorite foods and getting your ass in gear to work hard. But that's all mental. Your body is capable of amazing things and wants you to be healthy - you just have to let your mind leave your body alone to do its thang! Do I still eat my favorite foods and go overboard sometimes? Of course I do, I'm human, and I can't live without chocolate or candy or (gulp) Saddledome Nachos! I just eat these things less, and I savour them because they are truly a treat. And sometimes I have days where I just eat whatever, and I know that I won't stop myself - and I vow to make the next day healthy and to work extra hard at the gym.
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